After placing my order at the fish and chips place near my place of business, the owner looked at one of his workers, pointed at me, and exclaimed, "this guy's a fucking genius."

Does he have a hidden camera in my bedroom? I wondered and worried.

His employee looked at me and asked, reasonably, why I was a genius. His boss explained:

"He takes his lunch now instead of at 12. No lines. No hustle and bustle. Just comes in, gets his lunch around 3, and now he only has an hour left to work. Genius."

I smiled, "yeah, it's nice."

The owner continued, "I'm never hungry at 12. I'm not even up. I bet you're still trying to wake up from partying the night before!"

"Yeah I'm barely up," I answered.

His employee slinked away and I continued waiting awkwardly. However, I did so with a heavy conscience. Here this man believed I worked 9-5 and took my lunch hour at 3, when in reality, I work 11-7 and basically take my lunch at the typical 3 hour lunch interval.

I'm not a fucking genius. I'm not even a genius.

However, in those 15 minutes it took to fry my fish and chips, I felt unstoppable.